When Jeffrey Oba’s A Quiet After screened at the Blue Unicorn Film Festival Africa (BUFF), its seven-minute runtime was enough to examine a familiar experience: what happens when there is little room to grieve after a loss.
Produced by Esther Okoro, the short film follows Emeka, a young Igbo man who suddenly loses his father. Yet, even in the immediate aftermath of his death, life does not stop. Condolence calls continue, responsibilities pile up, and cultural and family expectations demand his attention.
Played by Victor Ebere, Emeka struggles to find a moment to process his loss as he is reminded to step into his father’s shoes and “be a man.” There is little consideration for whether he is ready or how he is processing his grief.
Set within a recognisable Nigerian social context, A Quiet After examines grief through the expectations placed on those left behind.
The Cultural Subtext of Grief
Oba says the film was influenced by the way grief is often understood and expressed within Nigerian society. While people readily show up during the immediate aftermath of a death through funerals, condolences, prayers and gatherings, he believes there is less space for what happens after everyone leaves.
Speaking with The Nollywood Reporter (TNR), he says there is often an expectation that life must continue and, for men especially, that continuing is associated with strength.
This expectation shapes Emeka’s response throughout the film. He says little beyond “Thank you” to the stream of calls and condolences that leave little room for him to sit with what has happened.
As Ebere puts it in the film, “Emeka just wants to breathe but nobody is letting him breathe.”
“I haven't experienced this before,” Oba said of the grief depicted in the film.
Rather than drawing from a personal experience of losing a parent, the writer-director approached the subject through observation and research. His interest came from watching how grief is treated within Nigerian communities, particularly the ways men around him responded to loss.
For Oba, there is an interesting tension in how Nigerians respond to people who are grieving. People call, check in repeatedly and show up because they genuinely care. At other times, he says, these gestures can become obligations performed because society expects them.
“The action is there, but the emotional presence is not always.”
This tension sits at the centre of A Quiet After, which questions what happens when the appearance of being okay becomes more important than actually processing grief.
In Nigerian society, Oba says, there can be a cultural expectation for men to remain composed, useful and responsible even in the aftermath of loss.
“I wanted to question that without necessarily condemning it. The film is less about saying men grieve incorrectly and more about asking where we learned that this is what grief is supposed to look like,” he said.
Something the Audience May Miss
Beyond grief, masculinity, death and culture, Oba believes A Quiet After also quietly explores normalcy.
He says grief is often imagined through dramatic expressions such as crying, breaking down or remembering the person who died. But sometimes, it appears in the continuation of ordinary routines despite the fact that everything has changed.
“Eating. Sitting in a room. Looking at an object. Going outside. Completing a task. Even when there is a gaping hole, a shoe is left empty.”
This idea was important to Oba because A Quiet After does not attempt to present an extraordinary depiction of grief. Instead, it reflects how grief can become part of ordinary life.
The film also considers the difference between presence and performance. Someone can call every day because they care, but they can also call because they feel obligated to fulfil a social expectation.
“Sometimes those things overlap, and sometimes they don't. That ambiguity is part of what makes our relationships with grief interesting.”
As a reflection of society, Oba hopes audiences recognise behaviours they may have seen in themselves, their families or people around them, even if they had never consciously identified those behaviours as part of grief.
Films as Emotional Reminders
With grief at the heart of A Quiet After, Oba believes films can function as emotional reminders by allowing audiences to encounter feelings they may not always have the language to express.
“Sometimes you don't watch a film and learn something new. You watch it and recognise something you already knew but had never really looked at.”
His relationship with the film is therefore more observational than autobiographical. His understanding comes from watching how grief is handled within Nigerian contexts, including the experiences of men in his community and a close friend who responded to loss with immediacy rather than patience.
As a sociology graduate, Oba's curiosity eventually led him to research grief and examine behaviours he had observed but not personally experienced in the same way.
“I wanted to understand where some of these behaviours come from.”
Ultimately, Oba sees A Quiet After as a mirror rather than a judgment of how people respond to loss. The film reflects what has become normal within Nigerian society without necessarily presenting those behaviours as right or wrong.
“If one person watches it and sees a part of themselves, or recognises someone they know, then the film has done what I wanted it to do.”
